I worked like a mad woman. No jumping off the wagon this time. But these last few days have been HARD. Really hard, like I just wanted to give up and scream and kick and destroy something and drink myself into oblivion. But I didn’t. Because
1) I don’t want to, I just don’t want to feel whatever it is I’m feeling at that moment. I want the feeling to go away. Fly away on wings made of chablis.
2) I found this absolutely brilliant person and she and I have made a pact. We will not have that first drink without telling the other person, but it quickly became more than that. These past few days she has been a little like those lifelines on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. We have e-mailed back and forth and I have used lots of very bad words and lots of ANGRY CAPITAL LETTERS and in writing and reading I have been able to get that pause that I need to catch up with myself and what I really want. That pause gives me the ability to put things in perspective, to see the bigger picture – and for that I am grateful. Thank you.
Now let’s all listen to this rather crap song and get on with our day.