On my 27th day

I worked like a mad woman. No jumping off the wagon this time. But these last few days have been HARD. Really hard, like I just wanted to give up and scream and kick and destroy something and drink myself into oblivion. But I didn’t. Because

1) I don’t want to, I just don’t want to feel whatever it is I’m feeling at that moment. I want the feeling to go away. Fly away on wings made of chablis.

2) I found this absolutely brilliant person and she and I have made a pact. We will not have that first drink without telling the other person, but it quickly became more than that. These past few days she has been a little like those lifelines on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. We have e-mailed back and forth and I have used lots of very bad words and lots of ANGRY CAPITAL LETTERS and in writing and reading I have been able to get that pause that I need to catch up with myself and what I really want. That pause gives me the ability to put things in perspective, to see the bigger picture – and for that I am grateful. Thank you.

Now let’s all listen to this rather crap song and get on with our day.

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2 thoughts on “On my 27th day

  1. D’you know I clicked on that with my fingers crossed. It was me! Phew! And thank you. When you’re sober for 6,000 days and like THE most famous non drinker I’ll be able to tell everyone all about the free therapy I got from you and they’ll be sooo jealous. You’re amazing, funny, wise and too clever for your own good.

    Liked by 2 people

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